(Proof that Chris even shaved his head (most of it) for me after I mentioned my love of a good looking shaved head! The only picture I have of him, ironically enough.)
How he spoke my name alone, had me twirling my hair around my finger, smiling from ear to ear, my knees buckling and completely forgetting my place. That is to say, until I woke up from my pleasant day dream, saw him, and found myself sitting front and center in NR (Natural resources) 102 hearing his tongue speak words like ecology, sustainability, biology, wetlands, wild flowers, mountain ranges, and savannas in his ever so addictive accent.
Chris was my teacher, or Teachers Assistant. Not a good combination with having a crush when you believe in making good grades based on knowledge, not flirting skills. But still, I found myself reading my text book more intently, never missing a lecture and raising my hand to answer questions. I always made sure I was looking my cute natural self for class and even stayed after on a few occasions to ask him a specific question about an upcoming assignment. Secretly, I already knew the answers. I was even unabashed enough to venture to his office a few times.
Unfortunately all my advances, subtle or not so subtle, never advanced. Finals arrived. Christmas break came upon us and my crush and I parted ways. He traveled East to Boston and I went home after seeing my extra-well earned A posted nicely on his office door. In the very least, I had received quality eye and ear candy, romantic crush daydreams, plus a good grade for the past three months. Not bad for a romantic at heart. He soon fell out of my head as the snow fell from the sky.
*
January of 1997 marked the start of winter quarter. The Logan cold was bitter, so I decided to trade in frostbite from a frigged walk in wind chill temperatures for a shuttle bus ride to campus. As I peered around the crowded bus for an empty seat I saw Chris ushering me to the seat beside him with his trademark smile .
Here was my quarter long crush, my teacher...except now, he was no longer my teacher. That thought held intriguing possibilities. Eager to hear how his Christmas break had been I sat down next to him and we struck up conversation. He mentioned that he was baptized into the LDS church the Saturday after finals. Assumptions had led me to believe he was not LDS and I had no clue he was investigating. This fact definitely made the possibility of dating him easier, but changed my perspective of him.
Chris was a Frat boy who appealed to my wild side. I'm certain he had been around. No doubt he had experienced a college atmosphere in Boston quite opposite of mine in Utah. Other than him, the Fraternity boys held no interest for me. They were only out for one thing. Chris was different. He was put together, older, clean, focused and had direction.
We arrived on campus, walked to the Biology and Natural Resources building together where he followed me to my class before venturing to his office. Needless to say, spending the short bus ride with Chris, as my peer, made the cold winter day slightly warmer.
Later that night while I was at work, he phoned my apartment. The sneaky guy apparently lacked a little nerve and asked a mutual friend for my phone number instead of me. My quarter long crush, MY TEACHER, had called me. I could not believe my crush was reciprocating. Not only did he call, leave his number and then want me to call him back; but he wanted me to call him back when I got home...even though he understood I would not be home until midnight.
So I came home, heard the news, jumped for joy and then thought about my next move. Do I call him? Will I look too eager? Should I wait till morning and hope to see him on the bus again? I've never been one for game playing and since I knew the possibility for sleep was null and void due to my giddiness, I picked up the phone and dialed his number.
*
Chris had been waiting up for me. We talked until 3:30 in the morning. He shared with me nearly everything you would inquire in a first real conversation. We spoke about his family, about Boston, his conversion, how he missed his sister who was his best friend; his likes and dislikes while dealing with the sheep he was studying for his doctorate in Micro Biology. Yes, he was the complete package: a handsome nature loving, hiking boot wearing genius!
We shared an intellectually stimulating conversation about religion, our testimonies, future goals and aspirations and he even offered to tutor me in math! Ahh, a math man! I thought I had died and gone to heaven. Any guy who understood and loved math immediately held a place in my heart! Chris was no exception and he was brilliant at mathematics. The thought of him tutoring me made me feel once again like his love struck student.
He asked me out for the following night and told me he had really wanted to take me out the previous quarter, but since I was his student he did not want to bridge the ethical divide. I respected that and blushed thinking about all my assumed failed attempts to have him notice me. He must have loved me chasing him as much as I loved the chase, though he never let on otherwise. He told me he had been attracted to me from the first day of class and looked forward to teaching every Tuesday and Thursday just to be able to see me. I bathed in all his sweet honest words and issued this in return,
“So that is why I received an A?”
He laughed and said in his eastern rich tone, “no, your smart and the fact that you're cute didn't hurt”.
As we ended our conversation we laughed at how long we had been talking on the phone when we figured out we only lived a block away from each other and could have just met up! I went to bed with thoughts of Chris and our impending date dancing around in my head.
*
I walked around with wings on my feet the next day in anticipation of our date. Chris picked me up and was very much a gentleman. He took me to a fancy restaurant in town, a movie, and enchanted me with good conversation and flirting. As the evening wore on, rather too quickly it seemed, we wound up at his apartment talking, cuddling, listening to music, and looking at pictures till 4 a.m!
I had to work early the next morning, and my good girl self needed to get home fast! He drove me the block home, walked me to my door and continued to give me the sweetest, softest, littlest of a kiss on my forehead. Being with him had me skipping in a drunken haze to my bedroom, but that kiss left me craving him even more. Could not sleep and work have waited?
Sunday arrived and I promised him I'd call. The apartment was quiet so I invited him over for a movie. Our bodies sat entangled on the love seat while A River Runs Through It was a blur on the television screen. For three hours I was in bliss anticipating his lips while his fingers fell through my hair. As the movie ended we watched the credits roll on, both awkwardly anticipating where to go next. Walking the few hand held steps to the door for our goodbye was full of intrepidness. He lightly grabbed my face, lifted my chin as he leaned in for a kiss. We spent the next half and hour leaning against the door- talking, kissing and laughing until I finally forced myself to bid him goodnight.
Could life get any sweeter then the culminating events of my crushing daydreams? I think not.
Chris and I continued kissing, I mean dating. I let him flop around in the cooler with vitality for a while in which time the steam whistle from the hot kettle waned, the crushing candle flickered out and we equally decided not to date each other anymore. We fostered a close friendship that even lasted until the next year, but besides our obvious physical attraction for each other, and my love of his vocal inflections, crushing on him seemed sweeter then the capture.
I never made it anywhere closer than the thought of Mrs Christopher Titus, but hindsight being 20/20- I always knew Jennifer Titus sounded a little quirky anyhow. At any rate, thanks to Chris, crushing on him and all that daydreaming got me through a tough 18 credit quarter, full time work, and a long cold Logan winter, all the while providing a good 'hot for teacher' story that goes down in my history books!
Isn't it so fun to look back? :D
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